There is no doubt that motherhood is demanding. It can be a challenge to maintain your composure during the stressful times, be it a first time mother calming a crying infant, several small children demanding equal attention, or dealing with an irrational two year old. Couple this with the daily stressors of managing a household, can inevitably reach a point when everyone can feel a little “out of control.” You are not alone with your feelings of frustration and helplessness! Always remember that you are a teacher and role model to your children. How you conduct yourself in these stressful situations will play a large factor in how they behave when engaged in relationships of their own. Teach your children boundaries, values, morals, and respect by demonstrating them yourself. Chaotic situations can be controlled when you are armed with strategies to deal with your children in a positive manner. Keep yourself calm, cool, and collected by implementing some of the following tactics.
• Be gentle with yourself and listen to your heart.
• Phone a friend or family member.
• Phone a parenting hotline.
• Escape to an area of the house that is quiet for 5 minutes.
• Light a favorite scented candle.
• Play a favorite CD and listen with headphones.
• Have a stash of goodies to sweeten the moment, such as chocolate or caramels.
• If you have more than one child, prioritize and concentrate on one child’s immediate needs at a time. Don’t try to do three things at once!
• Take time for yourself by putting on your child’s favorite video or DVD.
• Sing a song out loud (try Kum-by-ah!).
• Use positive “self-talk”. Have some inspiring or calming phrases to say, such as, “this will pass”, “they grow up too fast”.
• Read the funny little quips or a short story from Readers Digest.
• Phone your spouse at work and ask them to come home a little earlier, if possible.
• Seek out a sitter or mother’s helper to see if they’re immediately available to come over and play with the kids.
• Do some yoga or tai chi moves – perhaps the kids will join in! Relieve tension by taking deep, cleansing breaths along with gentle stretching.
• Join a meditation class for tips and ideas keep you centered.
• Keep pictures visible to keep yourself grounded and to remember your life in the “bigger picture” rather than the immediate moment.
• Remember a serene, peaceful place to comfort you. Visualize the place and the feelings it generates.
My personal favorite!
Use humor! Imitating your children and making them laugh can turn things around quickly!